Monday, February 4, 2013

Real Talk- It's Your Vagina Honey




http://www.huffingtonpost.com/joyce-mcfadden/female-sexuality_b_2611596.html?utm_hp_ref=parents

This article touches on topics that are near and dear to me. They always have been, whether I was aware of it or not. Decades later I have funny stories to share that get a giggle to relieve the pain. It's optional suffering that went along with it that I want to spare my daughter. Reading articles like these both give me hope that we are making some progress and give me pause - to take catch the breath taken away by the reports of how women continue to be treated the whole world 'round.



and then you read articles like this... http://www.cracked.com/article_19785_5-ways-modern-men-are-trained-to-hate-women.html

what i call Cop out with yore cock out! 5 points that could be summed up with- the very essence driving my entire gender is something outside my control, removed from my influence. My response- WHAAA! Not so great explanation- no excuse. Step aside and go spank it out among yourselves while the fairer sex you so revile cleans up your effing mess.

My daughter (and your son or daughter) is receiving her resilience training in this mess- it's her childhood. The folks I was surrounded by were barely aware, let alone mindful. I'm sure I've got quite a few friends who love me but really wish can't wait until the soapbox caves under the weight of my incessant ranting. Unlikely. I am the only parent my incredible and capable and clever and beautiful daughter will ever have so I'm going to do everything at my disposal to ensure she is responsible, resilient and ready to handle whatever the ride brings her- from the great to the hate. If I have anything to do with it, she will not going to wonder if she is good enough or lovable. And she certainly won't be engaging, let alone entertaining, the thought that she deserves even a fraction of the bullshit I've endured due to low levels of the vital mineral self-esteem. Only the privileged few know of my intermittent low self esteem- so let's keep moving.

I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I do know that what I see and what we are made to suffer is NOT OKAY. So let's help our kids and our friends and our families have a better experience with their bodies so they can have half a gnat's ass of a chance at deciphering their feelings so they won't be even one of a few kinds of asshole. And if you don't have the cajones to have these kinds of candid conversations and own your place in the world - call me. I do and I'm happy to help.  

Monday, January 28, 2013

Taking Words Back: Diet



When did the word diet lose its intended meaning? When did food stop being something we all have free access to? When did doctors stop healing?

Is it the chemical companies? Is it marketing? Was it when the pursuit of happiness was rerouted and the detour has become the primary route?

What do you think when you hear the word diet? Do you connect food to how your body feels and functions?  

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Discounts Don't Count

http://onebillionrising.org/blog/entry/introducing-the-obr-article-series-dr.-vandana-shiva-1


"discounting their contribution to the economy"

"production for sustenance is counted as "non-production"

"An economics of commodification creates a culture of commodification, where everything has a price and nothing has value."





Now that the Violence Against Women Act has expired - the excuse of provisions for women on reservations and in the military - two groups who are the very embodiment of the American Woman - the parity between women in the so-called evolved USA and developing nations. Sexism and misogyny are institutionally ingrained and socially acceptable, where racism is generally kept under wraps and even homophobia is on the wane. One look at how our bodies are eligible for legislation and rape eludes standard definition in the courts across the USA.We are far from universally progressive by a long shot - but there are still too few willing to admit the disparities and the fact that in the USA men are "free" and women are "discounted".  

Having spent the better part of the past 20+ years creating media and at least the last 15 years in PR, marketing and advertising working with some of the largest and most influential global brands.The contradiction is striking: women are known the world over to make the majority of financial determinations in household economics. I have had to correct many quasi-feminist friends, albeit mostly male, that this does NOT mean that they have the control to determine their own financial course. In general, it means that they are tasked with spending someone else's money in order to ensure the survival of themselves and their children. 

The gap between east and west is not so great...the only difference is tone - our voice is one if you listen closely. 

New Three R's for Boys (and girls) Who Dare



Is this teaching? I say no. "How to not" is reactive and assumes and accepts the active as inevitable.

What would Don't Rape 1A even look like? What assumptions would those lessons make? Maybe the three R's: Responsibility and Respect in Relating to other human beings.

I suspect that 1A would have pre-requisites like "Defining and Communicating Human Needs"; "Articulating the Human Experience" - with "Self-Love" and "Feelings are Okay" in orientation.

A girl can dream.