why do you care?

it's what i think about whenever i watch something and want to keep watching or want to watch more. it's even easier than putting a book down, for me words get more of a shot. it's infinitely easier to say no thanks to a snack or choose another food stuff for lunch than it is to avoid or walk away from a conversation- just me and i digress...

i wonder why people get involved with the people they do- is it about filling in the gaps? my gaps or their gaps or both? it's not always about chasing a moving object- sometimes it's about the wonder of what if. what if i could be brave and real enough to be a shit like Larry David or Hank Moody? I don't know about all you girls but damn if he doesn't tell it like it is- a morning of awkward is better than a night of lonely? though we don't really see him lonely and he does seem to genuinely appreciate something about each of the women he defiles. but knowing that the women don't get to have feelings and that his heart does belong to someone- does she get to know that? what difference does it make? why would you want to be a passenger on a train that careens off its track every so often every day? why is that irresistible?

different track here- why do so many people like Sex and the City? who has any sense of familiarity or compassion or can relate to that? to any of them? i confess up front that i have not only seen most episodes broadcast, on DVD or in syndication with the expletives bleeped out- more than once! and the movie on a date! his choice! i think i even cut school. but there is something about the depiction of human relationships regardless of your footwear, financial station, career or sexual prowess that grips an audience when it is concocted correct.

this has always fascinated me. the WHAT. the making sense out of what people do and why the hell they do it despite how terminally moronic it might be, the if-loving-you-is-wrong-i-don't-want-to-be-right thing that i think defines humanity in a huge sense. if it weren't for this truth being told then a whole heaping hunk of my emotional reality wouldn't exist. i've been a musical masochist for every since I can remember- FEELINGS was an early one that my mom took away from me because i cried too much listening to it- now don't even get me started- perhaps i am addicted to heart ache or maybe i'm just like all of the other fools out there who just want those sensations hiding deep down inside to come out and play. is that why we like the dickheads and derelicts? do they rub us the wrong way and well who cares, maybe it's a case of i don't care how you rub me just rub me! and after all it's friction that gets teh job done isn't it?

the Waitress was not all warm and mooshy- she wasn't even really sweet and you could only feel so bad for her considering she didn't really seem to be trying so hard to get out of what made her so miserable. i don't know any movie that i like or any character that i respect that's so damn nice- freaks, fuckers and failures, i've got some for you. don't worry, no spoiler alert, this one coming right up is, well I ain't telling for once.