Saturday night taking a break from writing to watch Bette Davis in NOW, VOYAGER- 1942. Jerry, he cannot go on taking- but he won't give her what she wants and he wants, so his decision is to stop altogether. She has settled for indulging in a fantasy because it's a close as she can get to loving the man who just doesn't love her enough to allow the love to flow freely. Is it worse that she accepts giving selflessly instead of demanding the love that she wants and deserves? Or is she taking the love that is available, keeping what she can have instead of having nothing at all? When Mr. Unrequited love asks if she will be happy, her reply ends the movie with "don't let's ask for the moon when we have the stars."
Now, Voyager final scene
So much media --the stuff that our myths are made of, the stories whether they be movies, books, TV- they all tell us there is something wrong with you if you are a woman alone. Yet according to the American way, especially post-feminist era, it is rugged individualism that should not be compromised no matter, nothing is worth settling.
I pose the question-- what's so wrong with accepting where you are, what you have and being honest about your openness to something better coming along? What if I waited until the perfect surf came- I might have never surfed. Isn't learning a series of imperfections, lessons accumulated for use to try and do better when next time shows up? I am a firm believer in try, try again. If you break a leg you don't sit on your bumm and wait until it gets better- that was the old days (and I suspect they had no time or patience then either)- before we had crutches. Sometimes crutches do help you get by until you can fly. Too bad I don't think that's what happened to Charlotte Vale, damn male screenwriters and novelists!
8 years ago
1 comment:
I am all about being happy in the now. I like to think by doing this makes me open for the possibility of other things -- much more so than if I was miserable in the now. To me there is a huge difference between being open to possibilities and sitting around waiting for them. Being happy now means getting out there and living. And the funny thing is thar sometimes life gives you things you'd never thought of but are far better than anything you could have dreamed.
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