the ether. i've got so many irons in the fire it's barely conceivable. here i am spending another afternoon at my favorite cafe FOUR CORNERS in Albany as writing at home (home, brought to you by the parents, more on that later) is not going to happen with so many people and all of their stuff and stuff they are doing overlapping. yes folks I have a web content development gig (terrymcmillan.com) going on, movie marketing (shecriesyoudie.com) writing a TV pilot (smokeandmirrorstv.com)for a table read Thursday and pitching in LA next week. There are also a couple of docs and 2 or 3 other screenplay ideas in some stage of development and a fabulous career changing barter going on with Ellen Sandler (sandlerink.com), plus the bookkeeping I do for my dad's business.
Like a mother with too many children and little capacity or skill to communicate the need or type of help that might be helpful, I juggle them all watching my hopes for exercise, eating well and moments of solitude (love? leisure? laziness? somebody elses luxuries to be sure) slip away like an interrupted dream.
A woman and her two kids just passed by the window decked in hipster fashion finery and equipment. It really made me miss my baby Xoxa. yeah I know she is a feisty and fabulous 5 years old, but that doesn't mean i don't wish we had more time just me and her, to chill and enjoy each other like we did when we had our own space. she loves her grandparents and we will be on our own soon enough. it won't be like this for very long (in fact this BROKE and UNDEREMPLOYED bullshit has been stale for more than a minute too long) in fact it's changing every minute. I really want the shoe on the other foot already. I want to enjoy my parents, not feel like crap-ola because despite my best efforts i need their help.
It does help that i know i'm not alone. I count my blessings and make sure my daughter feels loved. then i work some more.